Movie Review - Manikarnika

Is it kosher to review a 'patriotic' movie; that too on Republic Day? 

We shall start with analogies. It reminded me of some government scheme which tries to achieve many ends. To that end, it frames ample justification. There is a whole "animal" protection angle, so you get a whole scene with English officers waiting for their 'tender calf meat' meal. The rescued calf belongs to 'village folk', who having nothing better to do, have a whole song and dance thing going on at night - to help the meandering plot negotiate, what can called, for the lack of a better term, an item song. There is the whole 'qaum' and 'qaum ke gaddaar', who get their just deserts. There is the whole 'English is just a language' angle! (In mid 19th century!) To top it all, there is palace intrigue, of a kind even the saas bahu soaps would have left behind in the last decade.

Like any good state scheme, it has a 'cover all' clause - "we are taking some cinematic liberty here, don't mind!" It also has a Committee, of three eminent historians, who have vetted the script. God alone knows whether the liberties were taken after the vetting, or before it - one must RTI the note-sheet for that! One must be really forgetting one's history lessons - for one cannot recall the terms of the Subsidiary Alliances including stipulations that the rajas must wear bangles, and their praja must curtsey the Company's troops. 

Liberty has been taken with military sciences too. A Captain is commanding a battalion, instead of a company. They are not any ordinary 1000-something battalions either. Some are as big as 12000 troops. God knows what their brigades and Divisions would have looked like! While the Raja cowers before the Captain, he can somehow push around the Major. The Major must have been from the Royal Corps of Buffoons - with that dress (I cannot summon enough imagination to call that a uniform). Why couldn't the mere fact that they were trying to gain, on unfair terms, a foreign land, be enough to make them villain; why did they to be transformed into evil caricature. That too when you do acknowledge that the enemy was gracious with encomiums at the end of it. It must rankle the Brits more than the on-going Brexit farce! 

While we are at the topic of academic pursuits wronged by this Magnum opus, we should not forget our dear Physics. Wall mounted cannons (which weigh God knows what) have been mounted on horse carts (some cart), and raced into the battle field (some horse), and steered on a dime (f*** the First Law of motion), and fired on the broadside (f*** the Third Law of Motion). One could have let it go as a piece of cinematic liberty, but this whole maneuver actually wins them the battle, so it is quite material to the plot. Then there is a leap done on horse back which makes us explore new limits of the strength of horse (and, for that matter, human) bones. (This Wikipedia vouches for though, with a picture of the spot. Be amused at your own peril!)

The only thing that stands out is the leading lady. She looks every bit a Queen, a warrior, a mother, a daughter. She is like MSD, waging a lonely battle in the last WC semi finals. Or, for that matter, like the last stand of the valiant Rani who is the subject of the movie. Plus, the cinematic effects are artistic. The special effects are world class. Effects alone, however, can't rescue a movie which does not show the single handed fight till death against numerous troops, and the sacrifice of one's dwelling by that sadhu on the river bank, to keep the brave-heart's mortal remains out of enemy hands (the reality), and instead shows her immolating herself in a fiery "Aum", caused by pouring gun powder on the field; gun powder that burns like petrol! I remember, more than two decades ago, we had a serial on Doordarshan about the legendary Rani of Jhansi. It was much more watchable. While it did not have these Special Effects, it had a title track made from Subhadra Kumari Chauhan's immortal poem. I guess the makers could not make do with 'Marxist distorted' history, but why, o why, could they not just stick with Subhadra Chauhan.